My ex boyfriend doesn't know what he wants. Men can be so confusing. If you two broke up and you're still playing games it can be so hard on your heart. Not knowing what he wants when you're very clear on the fact that you want him back is heart wrenching. No one can expect you to wait forever while he makes up his mind about what his future holds. You have a right to know what's going on before you completely fall apart emotionally. If he's wavering on getting back together or not, make the most of that. You can actually use his indecisiveness to pull him back to you.
If your ex boyfriend doesn't know what he wants, don't allow him to control your future. If you tell him that you'll wait patiently until he makes up his mind, you're setting yourself up for deep emotional torture. The moment a man realizes that a woman wants him more than anything, he'll make her wait. He'll draw it out for as long as possible just to test her devotion to him. It blows up a man's ego if a woman chases him around endlessly waiting for him to give her another chance. Don't put yourself in this position with your ex. If you've already made the mistake of telling him that you'll be his if he wants you, don't say it again.
You have a right to have the future you want. You're not going to get that with your ex by waiting for him. You have to make him chase after you and it's actually relatively easy to make that happen. The best thing you can do for yourself right now is to drop your boyfriend completely. You're sitting in a holding pattern until he gets his act together and comes to the realization that you're an amazing woman and the ideal partner for him. You have to remove yourself from that equation so he sees and feels that it's not completely and solely up to him to determine whether you two get back together.
The best advice you can take right now is to focus more on your own life and the things you enjoy that don't include your ex. Instead of spending an entire evening reading through old emails, go out with your friends to a nice restaurant. If you've been focused on him calling, turn off your phone and go to the gym. These next few weeks must be about you and not about him.
Your ex boyfriend will soon realize what he wants if you're not there waiting to take him back anymore. The silent threat of you disappearing from his life is enough to make him see that a future without you is one filled with emptiness and loneliness. By simply removing yourself from his life for a few weeks, you'll be accomplishing more than if you tried to talk to him all day, each of those days.